Preparing for college and the college application process are potentially the most stressful times of a student’s high school career.

However, chances are that the things you are stressing about are probably out of your control and that you are fixating on one of the many myths surrounding the college experience.

Some common worries for high schoolers include: writing the perfect essay, needing to attend the most prestigious school in order to be successful, obtaining SAT/ACT scores that aren’t realistic for them, and having the most unique resume. 

According to a Zinch.com survey, more than 40% of college bound students reported that they experienced a “great deal” of stress when applying to/choosing a college.  YOU ARE NOT ALONE! It is possible to get through the college selection process without adding unnecessary stress.  

Here are some tips:

Start early and get organized. Making big decisions last minute can increase stress exponentially.  Think of the most important factors that come into play when choosing a college. These may include: academic programs, location, expenses vs. financial aid/assistance, size, admission requirements, housing, activities offered, etc. It can be helpful to create a table that visually compiles all of the important information you will need to apply and choose the right college for you. This will help you to weigh the pros and cons of each school as you navigate the application process.  Additionally, keep a calendar handy that organizes key dates and deadlines. This way, all of the information will be in one place and hard to miss.

Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Parents, teachers, coaches, and friends can all be good resources during this process.  You may need assistance in making college visits, getting letters of recommendation, and identifying your goals in college.  From the start, it can be helpful to sit down with your parents to discuss financial considerations. Although discussing money can be stressful, it can reduce stress to know your options from the beginning.

Don’t focus on the rejections. After the applications are submitted…we wait.  Everyone will receive rejections when applying for college. This does not mean that you are not good enough, smart enough, or impressive enough.  Colleges are bombarded with applications with a limited amount of spots to fill. Focus your energy on the colleges that accepted you and making the right choice for yourself based on those colleges.  You may have had your heart set on a prestigious college that did not accept you. Remind yourself that it is your character that contributes to your success, not only the name of the college. Motivated people tend to be successful, so although the college you attend is important, it’s not the only factor in your success.

Don’t feel pressured to make the “perfect” college choice or choose a major prematurely. Few things in life are permanent.  That is, we all want to be happy with our first college choice, though if it’s not a good fit after all, that’s OK. The National Association for College Admission Counseling reports that 1 in 3 students that attend a four-year college transfer to a different institution.  We want to choose the college that seems like the best fit, while reducing the pressure of having to choose the PERFECT school. Furthermore, a study by Penn State, reports that 70 percent of students change their major at least once while in college, and 20 percent change it two or more times.  You may want to focus on your interests when entering into college, though keep an open mind. The next four years is a time for you to expand on your interests and learn more about yourself and your strength areas!

It’s okay to listen to feedback from your friends and family, but remember to ultimately trust your own gut feelings from where you should apply to what you write your essays about, and in the end, where you choose to attend!

Make sure to practice relaxing! During this process, stress can become overwhelming.  Take some time each day to relax and practice healthy coping skills. Take a walk, talk to a friend, draw, play with a pet, exercise, listen to music, or talk to a therapist.  Remember to take breaks and know when to quit for the day.  We can only focus on applications and essays for so long without feeling stressed.  Set your cell phone timer for 30-45 minutes while you work to remind yourself that you need to get up, stretch, and relax for a bit while you work.

Enlist the help of a psychologist or counselor. At Metta Psychology Group, our psychologists work with high schoolers at all phases of the college process. Gap years between high school and college are becoming more popular. A psychologis tcan help you and your family to assess your college readiness and make practical suggestions for post-high school options. Furthermore, if you have experienced anxiety, depression, ADHD, an eating disorder, or a fear of leaving home, you may find the support of a counselor to be beneficial during this time of transition. A psychologist or counselor can help you to locate appropriate services once you get to college and provide a bridge for your psychological care.

If our therapists can help you to reduce the pressure of finding the PERFECT college and the RIGHT major, you can then focus on the aspects of college that are most important: making new friends, interesting classes, and long awaited independence!