Developmentally, teens are experiencing a great deal of emotion related to identity development, physiological changes, independence and separation from parents, and interpersonal relationships.

It is not uncommon for teens to feel as though they are on an emotional roller coaster while coping with the transition into adulthood. Frequent moodiness, impulsivity, irrational behavior, poor decision-making, defiance, withdrawal, and selfish acts can leave parents and caregivers also feeling as though they are on the same emotional roller coaster ride.  

When behaviors increase in frequency and intensity, parents need to connect with a counselor to discuss potential areas of concern. Warning signs that may indicate a more serious behavioral problem include: angry or irritable mood, easily annoyed, frequent temper tantrums, getting in trouble at school, physical aggression or vindictiveness towards others, arguing with adults or authority figures, refusal to comply with rules, social problems, self-destructive behavior, blaming others, verbal aggression, and risky behaviors (i.e., experimentation with illegal substances or alcohol, unsafe driving, or premature sex). When a teen presents with these symptoms for at least six months, a diagnosis of a disruptive or impulse-control behavior may be warranted after an evaluation with a psychologist. However, adolescents act out for a multitude of reasons. Behavioral problems may be an external manifestation of underlying anxiety, depression, trauma, learning issues, or other mental illness. Therefore, it is essential for a thorough assessment with a therapist to gain a comprehensive understanding of current challenges. 

Parents that seek support from a therapist for their teen’s misbehaviors often share feelings of disheartenment, dejection, and frustration in their ongoing attempts to discipline a teen that is often quite out of control, thus causing significant stress on the entire family system. 

Our therapists can help by providing parents with support and training on positive and collaborative disciplinary strategies. Parents will learn how to better understand and validate intense emotions effectively, identify underlying goals of misbehavior, and increase compliance and cooperation at home. Teens will learn assertiveness, anger management, mindfulness, and emotion regulation strategies to reduce power struggles and overall stress. Additionally, therapists can collaborate with other members of a teen’s treatment team such as school counselors, teachers, pediatricians, and other professionals to increase prosocial behavior and improve overall functioning. With a therapist’s guidance, a sense of peace and calm can be restored in the family as well as a stronger, resilient parent-teen bond.